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Wednesday, July 27, 2005

who do they think they are?

i went for a public lecture last evening, and these 2 architects just about bored the pants off me (not literally, duh). sometimes these professionals can be so full of themselves. somehow, architects rank highly on the list of usual suspects. what gives this breed of designers an edge over others of the creative field, that they think they have the propensity for higher, more publicised ideals than the rest? equally perplexing is how they feel they have to talk about themselves and their works and their beliefs all the time, leaving little room for differences.

it could be that blind faith in one's ideals that spur one on to greater achievements. maybe. if you are/were a nazi. but there is always the flip side. more than one sets of theories nearly always exist . only with luck can one be at the top. there is only one philippe starcke, or one marc newson. where does one go with all that bigoted, one-minded belief if you are only mediocre? perhaps, in order to rise to the top, you have to take a lot of crap from everyone, and then when you've reached the pinnacle, you can afford to be egocentric/eccentric. only then will people fall over themselves at your feet, and accept you for all your brilliance.

teaching (expecially in the field of design, or the arts) has always daunted me, by sheer virtue of the unqualifiable nature of design. who is to say for certain if one idea is better than another? who is the lecturer to judge the value of a student's work? experience has a limited role. there are just so many ideas taking off tangentially that, worrying about the outcome will almost always cloud your judgements of the most important issue: the basic concept.

just for the record, i'm not a nazi. my geminiian instincts may endow me, at times, with nazi-like ideals, but putting thought into action is just out of the question. i remain a motivated slacker.

The Expatriate
Achtung! You are 38% brainwashworthy, 36% antitolerant, and 33% blindly patriotic
Congratulations! You are not susceptible to brainwashing, your values and cares extend beyond the borders of your own country, and your Blind Patriotism ("patriotism" for short) does not reach unhealthy levels. In Germany in the 30s, you would've left the country.





One bad scenario -- as I hypothetically project you back in time -- is that you just wouldn't have cared one way or the other about Nazism. Maybe politics don't interest you enough. But the fact that you took this test means they probably do. I'm gonna give you the benefit of the doubt.


Did you know that many of the smartest Germans departed prior to the beginning of World War II, because they knew some evil shit was brewing? Brain Drain. Many of them were scientists. It is very possible you could be one of them, depending on your age.



Conclusion: Born and raised in Germany in the early 1930's, you would not have been a Nazi.



My test tracked 3 variables How you compared to other people your age and gender:
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 61% on brainwashworthy
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 59% on antitolerant
free online datingfree online dating
You scored higher than 51% on patriotic
Link: The Would You Have Been a Nazi Test written by jason_bateman on Ok Cupid

Monday, July 25, 2005

what makes home home

recently, the flatmate and i have been looking for new accomodation. for a number of reasons, mainly, to be closer to the shops (won't be needing the car that much, so i'm doing my bit to save the earth!), and to be away from our dope-sniffing, chainsmoking, beer-guzzling neighbours who have a tendency to leave their trash in front of our door. we're apartment dwellers, so there are some shared spaces like corridors, stairs and the space in front of our front doors. their mafia-habits are on-again/off-again, so i can never be sure when it hits. but the last time they got rowdy, screams were heard, bodies were slammed around, a microwave was chucked, and their screen door needed to get replaced.

that said, i still call my current place home. to me, it means protection - a shield that separates me from the horrors (i get dramatic, bear with me) of peak hour traffic, discriminating service-providers, and sometimes, the cold outside. this is where i get the smells of home-cooked food (hence the term home-cooked, huh?). this is the place - a space i can call my own (albeit rented), where i feel a sense of security.

how can a rented place feel like it belongs to me? i've grown up in my parents' home, so i imagine i would identify a sense of home with ownership. but a rented property tends to evoke a certain transience and unreliability. somehow. but my criteria for renting someplace would be, in order of priority, a liking for the space, a certain satisfaction with its surroundings, price, and then assessibility.

it's really about what you feel about a space. for many people i know, travelling occupies just about half their lives, but they still call singapore their home. for the average city-dweller, the only time spent in the confines of their home is roughly equivalent to the number of hours of sleep they need. and for some, they consider their workplace their second (and sometimes first!) home.

i went to a friend's place today, and she was getting ready for her move out tomorrow. in the excitement of finding a new place, i wonder if she will miss her rented room in an old-but-cosy house down a rickety street in the varied suburb of richmond.

i wonder myself if i will be able to recount with fond memories all the properties i have rented, ten years down the road.

Wednesday, July 20, 2005

have you ever felt so small?

have you ever walked aimlessly down shelves and shelves full of books at the library, and pondered the impossibility of reading e.v.e.r.y book ever written?

have you ever wondered what good you could ever contribute to society, when just about everything's been done at least once before?

have you sat by the beach and thought about the difference between today's sunset and yesterday's? and the day before? and the day before that? and...

have you trudged up a path, and wondered how many other people who've walked there that same day have seen that little weed-with-the-small-yellow-flower growing in the crack on the ground?

have you ever sat in an exam hall, and imagined you knew the student who sat at that very same spot years and years ago?

have you trekked through a trail in a forest, and thought about the thoughts of other weary travellers wandering the same path?

have you looked at your thumb, and wondered if, really, there couldn't be someone else with the same thumbprint as you?

have you ever wondered if there were really no 2 snowflakes that were alike?

have you just sat listening to the crashing waves, and wondered if everyone held a 1-litre carton of seawater, how much of it would remain?

have you thought about someone, or something, just to have it appear (or happen) right before your eyes?


my answer to all these questions, is, yes. sometimes, it makes me wonder why i have to work or hold a job to validate my existence. there's simply so much wondering to do.

Friday, July 15, 2005

the rhinocerous cloud and the eucalyptus tree

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spent the last week in sunny ol' perth. still remember some of the sights from the family trip taken 9 years ago... though change is inevitable, it is good to be reminded of things that remain.

9 years later, i'm visiting on my own, driving a rented car all by myself (with the flatmate) to margaret river. no more dad-and-mom tag-team at the wheel. we had a flat tyre - we changed it. kudos.

things that will continue to remind me of the utopia that is western australia:

clear blue skies. a very real blue. not like the fake, pale ones we have in melbourne.

hospitality shown by auntie helen and relster (my fellow sufferer from bygone days at that publishing-firm-that-shall-not-be-named).

shops closing early, so the pace of life is kept regulated (read: slow).

the indian ocean. the sea breeze. lemon meringue and a flat white by cottesloe beach.

golden rays of the sun, beating relentlessly on the sprawling aussie bush.

lazy afternoons at vineyards, or spent lying on the rocks listening to waves crashing.

great seafood (forget freo. head south to margaret river!) and wine and dairy.

the feeling of being all alone in the all-encompassing vastness of mother Earth.


in such wide open spaces, it is easy to ignore the lack of stewardship with public-donated funds by the ex-CEO of the Naional Kidney Foundation of singas. in such wide open spaces, one begins to be reminded of life and its transcience: how easy it is to snuff with explosives in public places. in such wide open spaces, one is concerned not with material belongings nor social standing, but with the soul and the cosmos. in such wide open spaces, the small dramas of life are laughable.

check out the photos!

Sunday, July 03, 2005

chuffed!

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i got crafty this weekend, and set my heart on some DIY screen-painted t-shirts. couldn't help showing off just a bit... this page has it all! i bow m(_ _)m to Kristy. eternally grateful, i am.

edited to add:my lovely flatmate wants the credit for the design of the t-shirt: the jagged rays of the rising sun, right down to the choosing of the sumo theme. i just did all the menial labour of tracing out everything in adobe inDesign and onto the sheer material. and screening it onto the t-shirts.

always harboured a secret desire to be a well-known designer for a street label. clothes, stickers, skateboards... the works! how do those guys always churn out stuff like that, i wonder. my sense of fashion is straightlaced, boring. i'm a t-shirt and jeans kinda girl, a person of few colours, and even fewer accessories. red, blue, gray, black and white. as they say, clothes maketh the (wo)man. i sometimes wonder what others can tell about me from my clothes.

besides apparel, shoes and accessories, the other essential i cannot leave home without is usually a bag. i change bags frequently (just between 4 different ones right now), and the reason i am usually running late for meetings has finally dawned on me. TOO MUCH JUNK i insist on carrying with me!

stuff i usually have stashed in my slingbag

01. wallet
fat. not with notes, but freaking heavy aussie coins!!!
and receipts.
and an endless array of cards. 3 bank cards, student card, student security pass, coffee loyalty card, 3 public library cards, a plaster for emergencies, driver's license, medibank card, 2 membership cards to separate DVD rental shops, fly buys (another loyalty programme over here), 1 metpass (train ticket).
gosh! all these just off the top of my head. who knows what else lurks inside my obese wallet? the same one i've used for the last 8 years. wow.

02. sketchbook + pen
had the sense NOT to get myself a hardbacked sketchbook. doesn't look as cool or design-ah, but hell, it adds waaaay less weight. hate to be without it, in case i see something, or have a brilliant thought. but half the time, it doesn't happen. :/

03. a book to read
i try to steer clear of heavyweights like War and Peace. or Harry Potter, for that matter. usually, just stuff i read through for research and ideas. design magazines are printed on 120gsm paper, hence usually too heavy for normal bringing-around. plus, i'm particular about the state of my design mags.

04. my oversized bunch of keys
hate it! the keys to my house, mailbox, outdoor storage, car, wheel-lock, postgrad studio. phew.

05. sweets
to ward off bad breath. and to add to my daily sugar intake. usually m&m's or gummy snakes.

06. water
heavyweight champion. i hate to carry the bottle around, but water's good for health and the wallet.

07. my Creative MuVo
realised 512MB ain't much, after all. but i need my music piped in a good amount of the time i'm on public transport. it's nice to have it blasting when i walk, too.

08. my Olympus digicam
for random arty-farty shots. i am shameless.

09. lip balm, eye-moisting drops
probably my only form of cosmetic care.

10. beanie + scarf
the cold scares me. *shudders* oh, and gloves too, these days.

11. oddments, various assortments
some bits of string, a button, a scrap of napkin from some cafe with something scribbled on it, and a shell. don't ask why.


that took awhile. it's no wonder i've been having backaches.

what's in your bag?

Friday, July 01, 2005

you can join, if you want

i'm a great fan of voluntary commitment. i mean, it doesn't count when responsibility falls into your lap, and you are left either clueless or hyperventilating from an overdrive to prove yourself. commitment has to be premeditated: much prior thought has to have traspired in preparation/anticipation for whatever commitment one is getting oneself into.

a programme on the Amish way of life was just showing on ABC. though they (ie. the Amish, not ABC) may be the butt of many a joke, i was left feeling that they seriously had something going for them. it surprised me, not because their points were arcanely Biblical, but also, rational.

being brought up in an Amish family/society with no access to electricity, vehicles and other "luxuries" (read: vanities) of modern life, an Amish kid is released to the world-at-large at age 16. the elders of this society let their kids go, with full knowlege of the dope, sex, booze and parties that kids at 16 are capable of. they are surprisingly open-minded about the whole affair, known as rumspringa, or literally, running around. these kids are given several years to experience the world (as we know it) with its hedonistic beliefs, and many will return to the fold, to the safety and spiritual security of their community. some do not return, and they are excommunicated and shunned. for those who do, they are rewarded with a community that truly functions without prejudice (and dare i say, politics), and are assured of a huge turnout at their eventual funerals.

my point is, that the Amish way of letting kids run their lives and independently commit themselves to lives of servitude and spirituality is something i find totally admirable. though the parents know of the imminent dangers, they ultimately allow their young to experience things first hand, and the ultimate decision is left to each individual. that, was how Communism had failed. it is virtually impossible to force everyone into the same mould. people should be left to decide, and once they take up a calling, or commitment, their minds will be satisfied with the personal belief of self worth.

half the battle is won once you want to join.